Here some things about Canadian Thanksgiving weekend:
1. It turns out I’m a complete nut job when put to hosting two Thanksgiving dinners, neither of which involved turkey. On Friday night, I made an enormous grocery list and I said to Dan: “Let’s make sure everything is on it because I don’t want to come back.” Well, har har har. Saturday morning I was back for fish. Saturday night I realized I had forgotten limes so Dan jumped over to Safeway right before dinner. On Sunday morning, while breastfeeding James, I had an entire conversation with myself about some polenta that went like this:
“The recipe calls for instant polenta, but what we found and bought was a weird tube of pre-prepared gelatinous polenta. It’s going to be a fail.”
“Ugh. I know!”
“Your stuffing is delicious. You should make that instead.”
“Ok, but that means going back the grocery story FOR THE FOURTH TIME IN THREE DAYS. Dan’s going to have a field day with your mania.”
“I know, I know. And you’re talking to yourself in the second person and referring to your own one self as a ‘we’ – you are probably a crazy person!”
I’m not going to tell you where Dan told me to put that polenta (as a joke, you guys!). And for the record my stuffing WAS delicious.
2. James will have twice as many Thanksgivings as most people. His second will be in one short month. What better holiday to have two of every year? Is there anything better than gathering around the table for a beautiful meal with people you care about to give thanks?
3. We had no agenda. We took long walks and spent hours in the park, the three of us. Dan and I watched movies. I cooked for hours. Sometimes, I have to remind myself on a daily basis with James to let go of making anything happen. To let the minutes unfold. To let him grab at leaves or stare at the sky.
4. So much of being a parent is the magic of the small things. A smile. A giggle. Tiny hands on your cheek.
Sometimes I think about how you slowly digest the idea of ‘taking things for granted’ over a lifetime. When we are little and are introduced to it, we take it to apply to things like our toys. Then bigger things: A roof over our heads. Then people: Our parents. Our family and friends. Then we understand it as it applies to things like education and opportunity.
Then you grow up and travel and watch the news and you realize how you have taken pretty much every thing you once thought was basic for granted: Safety. Potable water.
You wake up and feel grateful for these things.
James has really brought it down to size for me. Every day I look at him as if through a haze of magic. His little perfect body. His sweet breath. How can he be?! I think.
Isn’t it funny to think of my own mom looking at me thinking the very same thing: How can she be? And really it is wondrous thing there is, isn’t it? To be alive in this world.
I guess what I’m saying is that this Thanksgiving I am grateful for the miracle of simply being.
Happy Thanksgiving sweet readers. I’m oh-so-grateful you’re here too. ❤